My roommate was inspired by my chaotic repacking tactics and decided to take a picture.
With such a crazy travel itinerary its no wonder that I have found myself positively exhausted mentally and emotionally this week and down with the flu.
I called my Dr. Mom and she looked at my pixilated flushed cheeks and said my fever was about 101 and that the swine flu is only supposed to last for 3 days. She had it last spring the first time it went around so of course she should know. That's my mom for you, getting the flu before the rest of us just so she can tell us that every thing really will be alright when we get it. Mom also lost her button. Just some of life's moments which skype allows you to share.
I don't know if swines get this emotional when they are sick, but I've been a bit nutty the last few days. I know it has a lot to do with knowing that I have 5 weeks left of work, then 3 weeks traveling with Mom and Dad, and then 2 weeks to tie up loose ends, drink some gluwine and hop a plane home to the states. I am sure there is a partridge in a pear tree in there somewhere too.
I am not a very patient person as it turns out. In order to wait for something I want I start to tell myself that I don't want it at all. Apparently I prefer the disappointment over the anticipation. In high school I spent an entire week of volleyball tryouts praying they wouldn't pick me only to leave the gym on the last day higher then a kite with the delight of realizing I had made the team. And I've employed this many times since, sometimes there are just too many feelings to feel them all at once.
Right now I feel torn between loving my experience here and being really tired of dealing with the thousands of little things that come with daily life in a foreign country.
Traveling makes the little things worth it. Traveling is exciting but, once traveling is over, the little struggles are still there. My computer programs are still in German, my furniture is still someone else's, many of my friends are still completely out of touch. And yet, knowing how much I want to go home and see my family and friends and how much easier life will be in English in the states, I still find that I have to tell myself that I won't like it, that people won't be there anymore (and in fact, some might not), and that going home will be even harder than coming to Germany was.
And what's the purpose of all this negative self talk? It's so that I can find the patience to keep myself from throwing my uncompleted German tax forms (yes, in German) out the window and hoping the next plane home.
I have had my adventure, I loved it. But now I just want to sit on the couch with my dad on Saturday morning watching a western with a cinnamon roll in hand and some turkey noodle soup cooking on the stove for lunch. The list would be longer but I have the flu right now and well, this is all that sounds good. Oh and mom's there too, she's just not really watching the western.
I know its not that bad, I mean I only have to wait until November to see my parents. And then traveling in Italy will pass some time. I mean it's Italy! Would you believe mom is totally into the idea of couch surfing? Hilarious! I love it. If anybody knows someone in Italy with a couch you should let me know
...even better if it comes with a western.